Pants on fire...

Let's make a MMA ad for me. Let's make me sound good, but never actually lie. At least not exactly.

"...started wrestling at age 14, and began training in Judo in 1975. Added Karate, earning a Black Belt in 1986, and is currently training in Gracie Ju Jitsu. Is undefeated in MMA competition..."

Should I use this as my write up? There are no lies.

I did start wrestling at age 14 when my junior high school PE class did a unit on wrestling. A week or two later, we moved on to the next unit, and I never wrestled again until I started helping the wrestling coach at the school I teach at about ten years ago.

I also was introduced to Judo in about 1975. My army sergeant made us do it for a few weeks. I stopped as soon as I could, and have never done Judo again.

The Karate part is actually right. Fancy that.

I am also training in Gracie Ju Jitsu. The teacher is authorized to teach the method, and holds a Blue Belt. I've attended a single one-hour class so far.

I am also totally undefeated in MMA competition. I have used the cunning method of never competing. I am also undefeated in heavyweight boxing competition by the same criteria, Masters Tournament Golf. Granted, I've never won, either.

I recently read a fighter's bio that states they train with a former UFC Champion. Looked the teacher up, and it's false. Granted, on the "Champ's" website he doesn't directly claim to being a former champion.

His site says he is the, "UFC24 pay per view Middleweight Fight Champion." There is that Champion word again. He did fight at UFC 24 and he did win a middleweight fight. Champion? UFC doesn't record him as a champion, or his fight as a championship match. Going into that fight, he was 2 wins and 3 losses. His win made him 3-3. Eventually, his career ended with after nine fights. His ending record was 4 wins and 5 losses. I've only ever heard of one guy he's fought, and that guy destroyed him. Is he an experienced MMA fighter? Of course. Was he any kind of champion? Nope.

Does he lie about his record? Kinda. Does it mislead people? Yes. His top student had on her web page that her teacher was a former UFC Champion. I don't think she's lying, but clearly has misunderstood.

I think people need to be prouder of what they actually do, rather than what they haven't. Bald face lies are no worse than bent truths.

...and bald face lies are often much more entertaining.