Flying

I used to like flying, long ago, but I hate it now.

Everything is just all so random and senseless.

Take today. We arrive at the airport with another couple. Our trips were booked together. The check in was fine. In the security line, Helen and I received fancy green cards, and were moved ahead of a zillion other people lined up and waiting. We were through security in minutes.

Our friends were directed into a slow moving line, and when they actually reached security had to undergo a check of all their electronic devices.

We met up again at the gate.

Just before boarding a stern announcement insisted all devices be placed on airplane mode, effectively making them inert. Right after that was a perky Air Canada announcement telling us to download the Air Canada app for our upcoming flight.

We didn't, like good little drones, and so cannot watch any of the in-flight programming.

Ah, yes. The joys of flying.

Decks

On Sunday, Helen and I headed out on our latest cruise. We don't exactly go first class.

Into the car with the bags nice and early. We went the kilometre to the bus stop, and I got dumped out with the luggage. Helen took the car home, and walked back. Usually that's my job, but not with my current cranky knee. Caught the 7:23am bus that runs the 25 km to the ferry terminal.

Onto the ferry we went as foot passengers. It wasn't hard to manage, as we travel carry-on style.

45 minutes on the water, and onto another city bus on the other side. A small bonus was that the bus's money machine was out-of-order, so everybody got to ride for free.

Got to downtown Vancouver and turned into pedestrians for a bit. By this time we were in texting communication with our travel buddies who were already in the cruiseship terminal.

A few blocks later we were with them, awaiting the start of the three-part loading process. This got rolling pretty quickly.

Security was first. I beeped a bit, but no problems. Then it was US border control. It annoys me that they do this on Canadian soil, but it makes things work a lot better than if they didn't.

The last step is getting checked in with Princess Cruiselines.

We always go for low prices when we book these things. Sometimes we don't even splurge for a window or porthole, and sometimes we do. This time we did, as the deal was ridiculously cheap. Our three day cruise was bundled with two days at a nice hotel in LA, and included the flight home. It came to less then the air fair should have cost.

Cruise ships have their cheapest cabins way down low in the vessel, starting on deck 2. Ours were window rooms on deck 3. Classy?

Anyhow, during the processing we were informed we were getting an upgrade. We are first-time customers with Princess, so getting bumped up a bit was a pleasant surprise. Their room numbers didn't give much of a clue, as their passenger decks all have names instead of numbers. Our friends and us were all now on "Aloha" deck. I don't know what deck name our old rooms were supposed to be on.

We boarded and received directions to our cabins? A better class of deck 2? Deck 3? Keep in mind that every layer of upgrade is a good thing. As you move up through the categories the rooms grow in size, and amenities. Deck 4? Deck 5?

Our new home was way up where the cabins have outside glass walls instead of windows, and have private balconies. Deck 9? Deck 10?

We were to spend the next few days on the highest of the balcony decks. We were fancy deck 12 people. If you deduct the value of our flight and hotel from what we were paying, it came to about $40 per day. Under that, actually.

So what do we do with such a big, balconied cabin, besides giggle over our good fortune? Well, we tried to fill our walk-in closet with our two tiny carryon bags, and didn't make much of a dent.

My favourite feature turns out to be the balcony door. We sleep with it open to get the most wonderful air, and the lovely sound of the bow wave as we motor along.

The only down side is that we're rapidly getting spoiled for anything less.

Next and Purple promotions

Let's see. My next promotion in Jiu-Jitsu is getting close. When might it actually happen?

A Purple Belt is 3 promotions away. Just when is that possible to achieve?

The first requirement for promotion is 8 months of training. As my last promotion was in early March, I will satisfy that rule in November; less than two months away.

The same reasoning would put a Purple Belt in March of 2016.

The next is a minimum attendance at 10 Reflex classes per level. I have easily double that right now.

The last is a total of 90 advanced classes. I travel a lot, so there are some holes in my progress there. My upcoming trips are all entered into the old spreadsheet. Assuming perfect attendance while at home, which is my norm, I should be done with this requirement in the first week of January.

That's a little annoying. I'll be two classes short of completing the requirement before the school shuts for Christmas rather than afterwards. Oh, well.

The least calculable aspect is that after satisfying all the minimums, it is up to the instructor to decide if we are ready for promotion. I don't think he'll keep me waiting long. I am almost always on the mat during White Belt classes, and attend both open-mat sessions per week. I also take the odd private lesson as well.

Let's just say I get promoted as soon as I am eligible. The next one after that would be 8 months and 90 classes away again. That would be September 2015. If I deduct my holidays again, and add in the training I'll be doing in LA and in Arizona, I should have completed the 90 classes ahead of time in July.

Let's pretend I get promoted on schedule in September. The next would be the jump to Purple Belt. There is no set number for months or classes for that move. For me, I'd want a similar amount of progress, so I am self-imposing 8 months and another 90 classes. That would put the date in about May of 2016.

There will be no promotion for me anytime near May. A full-belt promotion only comes after evaluation by a Gracie. I would want to do it as part of an extended training visit to LA. For me, those come in the cold months, so the earliest would be the following November. By then it will have been 14 months, and I'll have accumulated over 200 advanced classes.

Hope I'm not too old by then. Let's see. November 2016 will make me 60... sixty?... SIXTY...

Holy crap.

Medical and Lenses

Chilling at Starbucks, and it's actually completely empty.

Just finished at the Doctor. Had a colonoscopy last year, and it was time to go back to see if I am lucky enough to need a second. Turns out I'm not, so can relax on that front.

I have had a life about as free from medical complications as is possible. I retired 16 months ago, and in that time I've had more doctorie stuff happening than in all of my preceding years combined.

Let's see...got a new doctor, who wanted a bunch of basic tests done. That brought up an indicator for the aforementioned colonoscopy. Everything was OK, but while he was in there he removed a few wee polyps. That, in turn, lead to today's call back.

I also managed to hurt my knee bad enough to visit my new GP. She sent me off for an MRI, which was interesting. No specific injury, but it looks like I have osteo-arthritis starting up. Then it was about a month of physiotherapy.

With all the doctor visits, I asked about a stupid lump in the middle of my back. My new doctor cheerfully cut it out for me. This was yet another visit, and then another to get the resulting stitches removed.

Even all this is no problem. I'm the same as I was, except with a stupid knee. Along the way I've had a camera shoved up my butt, and (hopefully) another down my throat. Been to the lab a slew of times with disgusting little samples. Got to visit a place in Vancouver that looked at the insides of my leg in 3d. Had my leg manipulated, exercised, and ultrasounded. Had my back cyst removed and had me some stitches.

In comparison, the year before I had.....nothing....and the year before that....nothing....

About the most annoying thing isn't really considered medical at all.

Just about every teacher in our province has been covered by an eyeglasses benefit, except those in our district. In the absolute last couple of my working months, we got one as well. It is the worst I've ever heard of; $200 every 3 years towards a pair of glasses.

I got new glasses. For the first time ever, I went nuts. Fancy super-lite lenses in space age material frames. It all came to about a thousand bucks, of which I got back $200 from my employer. Still, the most expensive pair of glasses I've ever had.

Last week I put them on the roof of the car just-for-a-second while I removed my sweatshirt. I drove off, they fell off, and several cars ran over them.

And now I'm an old, retired guy on a fixed income. Still, need lenses. Got an appointment to update my prescription but will not be buying from them. With my new info in hand, I'm going online to get my new specs. The price difference is is obscene. I can get a pair, with lenses, and fancy coatings for about $80. I could get ten pairs for what I spent on my last glasses.

Anyhow, that should prove interesting. Until then, I'm in my back up set.

Hope I don't walk into anything, and end up at the doctor.

Too Soft?

I love the Gracie Jiu-Jitsu system, but they are sure stingy with their promotions. This is quite amusing, as they attract a lot of hate online that says they just give their ranks away.

I think a lot of this is misunderstanding.

The Gracies have three separate, but related programs.

First is what goes on at their own Academy in Los Angeles. The standards there are very rigorous, and nobody ever accuses them of handing out belts willy nilly. An example is Ed O'Neil, the well-know TV actor. He has a Black Belt from the Gracies. Favouritism? Not likely. It took him 16 years to get it.

Second there are the Certified Training Centres. These are schools around the world lead by teachers who have gone through the Gracies instructor training program. Students at these schools are promoted in a fashion similar to the main Gracie Academy.

Third there is what the Gracies have named Gracie University. It is an online training method. At the end of the first part of the program, students can tape themselves performing a number of drills and upload their efforts. These are graded, and if good enough a Blue Belt can be earned. Continuing in the program in a similar fashion, it is possible to add a first stripe onto one's belt, and soon it will be possible to earn a second.

Nobody complains about the ranks from the first or second options being too easy. It is the third that draws all the flack.

Let's look at what happens if you begin the program. You sign up and pay your fee, and get access to a bunch of online video material, including the core 36 lessons. You start with lesson #1, called Trap and Roll. There is a 35 minute video, covering the concepts and moves for the 3 variations. All techniques have several variations, called “slices”.

Nay sayers would complain that watching a video doesn't make you able to do a technique, and they're right. Just watching all of the videos would be meaningless. However, this is automatically weeded out by the online testing procedure that I'll describe later.

Let's say you are serious, and practice the moves with a partner. No partner, no chance to figure out what's going on. So you are working together on the material, and something is wrong, you watch that part again, and try again. The video will end up acting as a reference. Let's say you are on the mat for an hour or so to get through it all. You still won't pass the Trap and Roll part of the exam. I've worked with a lot of beginners, and they never get it really right on the first day.

You follow the program exactly as prescribed, going through all 36 lessons, and then doing all 36 again, and then again for a third time.

Detractors say that isn't as good as learning from a real instructor, and I fully agree. A teacher can catch your mistakes for you, and correct them in a moment.

Let's say you decide it's time to test. You and your partner enlist a little help for the recording, and get to work practising the test itself.

Here, there are a million more complaints from outsiders. “Too easy to cheat,” they say.

“Bull,” I say.

The 36 techniques are divided into four groupings; Mount, Side Mount, Guard, and Standing. For example; the 3 variations of Trap and Roll are the first things done in the Mount Chapter.

It would be easy to pass if each Slice were recorded separately, or even if each Technique were to be done in isolation. That's not how it goes.

All of the Mount must be recorded as a single uninterrupted shot, as is Side Mount, Guard, and Standing. On average, each video must contain about 9 techniques or about 27 slices. There is a five-minute maximum for each of the four recordings.

It is OK to have the technique/slice names read out to the participants between movements, but no instruction can be given. No discussion can occur between the participants.

There is also a fifth video. It can be a short as four minutes, or as long as five. In it the the assistant attacks the candidate with any or all of the indicators that have been worked on, and in any order. It is called Free Style Fight Sim. To an untrained eye it will look as if the two are free rolling, but only the basic techniques are used.

As is is possible to do any or all of the test segments until the students are satisfied, the evaluation standard has been set correspondingly high. A maximum of 20 demerits are permitted on a passing test.

This is also the method of exam used by the Certified Training Centres. I studied under a qualified instructor to prepare for this exact same test. I have been in martial arts for over 30 years. I maintained almost perfect attendance. It took me 9 months of study, and I passed with 11 of the permitted 20 demerits. I can't really imagine preparing for this test in my basement with a buddy and actually passing.

Giving away Blue Belts? Hardly.

Could a person cheat? Actually, yes. If you had a Jiu-Jitsu friend and they were willing to put in the work to learn exactly what the Gracies expect on test videos, I guess you could get him to take the test for you. You'd actually need two such friends, as the recordings need two prepared people. To pass, they'd have to do everything exactly as the Gracies insist. It would be like getting them to learn the course for you. Assuming they agree, and pass, and claim to be you, then a lovely Gracie Blue Belt will arrive in the mail accompanied by a dandy certificate with your name on it.

So you decide to cheat. You registered with Gracie University and paid for the beginners course access ($144). You got a couple of trained friends to do the test, and they put in quite a bit of work to do so. You submitted the videos, and paid the evaluation fee ($85). Your friend passed, and a few weeks later a belt arrives with your falsified certificate.

I hate to tell you this, but you can buy a Blue Belt at any martial arts supply house for under $10. While you're at it, why not get a Purple instead. Blue is a dime a dozen. Purple is the rank that starts to mean something. Or Brown? Brown Belts are impressive. Black is nice, too.

While you're at it, put in 15 minutes with the right app and you can have a bitching certificate as well.

The point being, I am more impressed when I meet somebody who has a Gracie University Blue Belt over somebody who got theirs in a more conventional manner. Maybe they have limited free-rolling experience, but their dedication and determination cannot be questioned.

Be Small

So let's say in a given week I manage to spar with everybody in our advanced group at least once. That's about 10-12 people.

There are three people who can definitely out muscle me. This isn't all that big of a deal, unless the stronger person is also significantly larger. If they are both stronger, and bigger, it is easy for them to use that to neutralize moves and to generally dominate things.

Only two of the strong guys are also significantly larger than me.

Rolling with them is pretty predictable. I end up defending from the bottom most of the time. I wait for a mistake, or sometimes initiate a reversal. Everything that works for me has to be skill-based and works either by getting around strength and gravity, or by redirecting it.

How would I feel if I were a whole lot smaller?

It wouldn't be two guys out of a dozen that I'd be the smaller guy for. What would it be like to be the smallest in the class; out muscled and out massed in every, single roll?

I would almost always be on the bottom, getting crushed. Almost all my moves would be neutralized by the shear, oppresive bulk of my opponnets.

I weigh about 180. The biggest guy we've got is about 150% of that. Luckily for me, he's new to the advanced class. Even so, I have to get everything right, and to do it quickly and in an unpredictable fashion.

Facing the same guy, our smallest person isn't facing somebody 150% their size, but rather one of 225%. How do you work with that?

That's like me having to face an adult, silverback, mountain gorilla. (do the math and look it up)

Granted, not everybody is that much larger than our smallest person, but how would you feel?

Against the people who move, and use technique, there is no problem. If the opponent is trying to learn and improve, they would be pretending they had no size advantage and acting acordingly.

What about those who just shut things down with strength and crushing size? Clearly, the crusher isn't learning anything, and neither is the crushie. One of our smallest people told me recently that she gets so frustrated that she has fits of rage that are difficult to control.

I learn as much from rolling with a smaller person as with a bigger, stronger one. I try to use technique, the same as if I have no advantage. I'm sure I slip up on this, but I do try. If I rolled like a bigger person whenever I actually am larger, I'd be wasting most of my practice time. I'm one of the bigger guys here.

That way when I ended up rolling with giants down in Los Angeles I was ready. If I'd spent most of my time at home practicing being the larger, stronger person I'd have been crushed big time. As I try to always assume everybody is at least my size and strength, I was ready for bigger people.

When I first stepped onto the mat in LA, I already had about 300 rolls under my belt. I can't say I never acted as the larger person, but I think I always tried to treat smaller people as if they were at least my size. Instead of having experienced only about 30 matches as the smaller guy, I had simulated it for most of the remaining 270.

I did pretty well against the big, California guys, even if they tried to squish and dominate. I remember one in particular that happened within the first week of my arrival, and before I was feeling confident.

My partner was a really big guy. He looked like he'd been cast by Hollywood for the role of; “terrifying, big fighter”. He was well over half a foot taller than me, and outweighed me by well over 70 pounds. He was mostly muscle, with arms as big as my thighs, and a shaved head, and wore the same colour belt that I did. He was facing a little, old, grey-haired man.

I choked him out almost immediately, and continued to dominate him throughout our time together. I guess I was a bit of a dick, but it was just so cool. At the end we shook hands, and he asked me how long I'd been a Blue Belt. When I answered that I'd been in rank for two years, he said, “it shows”.

Evidence that minimizing use of size and strength not is not only good for the smaller partner, it is perhaps even more beneficial for the larger guy.

Dodging Bullets

There is a lot of dodging going on.

We left home on Thursday, and are heading back today; Wednesday.

The class I missed on Thursday was the last of a training cycle, and therefore review. I find this type of training important, but not as critical as the introduction of new material.

This week I'm missing the two classes that introduce the entire Half-Guard chapter. Yikes? But, it turns out to NOT be the case. The Guard chapter that we've just completed is so demanding that our instructor is adding two entire weeks of review. Instead of new material, I'm missing a reworking of Guard. Dodged a bullet there.

Later this fall, I'll be missing another week. This time it will land right on top of new material. Fortunately, I've already done half of it. For the remainder, I just happen to have three, prepaid private lessons stocked up. I'll be using one to go ever the part I don't already know, and drilling it during open mat times. Another land mine avoided.

Then...the big one hits. Right on top of the Leg Locks chapter. My two remaining private lessons will help, but won't be able to fully alleviate the "damage". I'll do what I can to mooch help from the other Blue Belts.

In a way, it doesn't really matter. There are no rules about catching everything except for my own desires. Whatever I miss will cycle around again in a little over a year, and I'll get it then.

Some bullets I can dodge, or minimize, and others will work themselves out eventually.

No advice to give

So here I am, an over-30-year veteran in the martial arts, and my brother-in-law turned to me for advice. He's interested in starting out, and wants something suitable for a guy in his 50s.

That's quite a puzzle. He lives in Victoria, and I can recommend both the Victoria Judo Club, and the University of Victoria Karate Club. Both are extremely well-run sources of instruction in highly reputable disciplines. If he were 20, I'd point him at both.

The problem is, he isn't 20 anymore. Both Judo and Karate will cripple him quickly. Mid-50s isn't even the same as being 40.

I could point him towards Tai Chi, but he is already into Yoga. Really, no advantage in Tai Chi for a Yoga guy.

Aikido? Maybe, but he'd need to find just the right instructor. I know no one in Victoria to recommend.

Sadly, there is no good option for an older person who wants to get into martial arts. Any style CAN work, but that's largely delendant on finding the right instructor.

I know a ton of otherwise great teachers who would be worse than useless for an older student.

My Jiu-Jitsu instructor would be fine, but we're a long way from Victoria.

Stoopid

“I am sick to death of the sloppy way weight divisions are regulated in the UFC.

Fighting in a weight class does not mean that the fighter actually weighs what he's supposed to. It means he is able to be that weight for a single moment, 24 hours before the actual fight.

These guys are all normally much, much larger. The way they do it is by a tortuous process of short term loss, most of it fluid. After making the weigh in, they usually balloon most of the way back to their actual weight.

This is extremely harmful to fighters' general health, and produces a sham equality. Why use weight at all? Why not height? Or arm length?

Or, if weight is the desired measure, why not have them actally fight at the weight they are supposed to be? There aren't all that many UFC contract fighters. They should have to check in regularly. They should fight at the weight they actually are.

No more failed weigh-ins. No more dehydration-induced organ failure.

But wait? Wouldn't that put almost everybody into the light-heavyweight and heavyweight divisions. Of course not; readjust the weights.

School

I am tired of the right-wing in Canada clamouring for us to copy the United States. They push for cuts to government spending, and for lower taxes.

Perhaps it has to do with the USA managing to have a higher GDP per capita than we do here. In terms of world rank, we are number 22, with a GDP of just over $38000 per person.

In comparison, the USA ranks higher at number 13, with a GDP of just under $46000 per head.

We should seek to emulate them, or so the right-wingers say.

If this is so, why shoot so low? Should we not attempt to copy whatever nation fills the number 1 slot?

I believe we should emulate the number one country on earth.

The highest per person GDP on earth is almost $146000 per year. The country to achieve this is Liechtenstein.

Isn't that interesting? A country with universal heath care is the richest on earth.

I wonder what their education system is like. They have a primary school pupil/teacher ration of 7.84 and a secondary school ratio of 10.67. In this type of ratio, smaller is better.

The USA has figures of 14.29 and 14.49 respectively.

Canada has a primary ratio of 17.42 and secondary of 18.8.

The USA is richer than us, and provides more teachers than we do. Lichtenstein is vastly richer than us and provides about twice as many teachers to its children as Canada.

Let's average each country's figures and make a comparative example.

A Canadian school with 250 students would be staffed with 14 teachers. A same-sized American school would have 17 teachers. The same school in Liechtenstein would be staffed by 27 teachers.

I bring this all up as my province is currently experiencing an education strike. The government refuses to allow any discussion about limits on class sizes. They keep talking about being unable to afford to do so. Of Canada's ten provinces we currently have the highest number of students per teacher. It is three pupils per teacher above the national average.

A 250 students school in BC would only have 12 teachers.

They say we cannot afford more, and yet continue cutting taxes on the wealthy, and on corporations.

Looking at both the United States and Liechtenstein I'd say we can't afford less.

Yoga

I know a lot of people who do Yoga. I've given it a try. It isn't for me.

Don't get mad. I do understand the appeal.

Slow movement, balance, gentle stretching, and all that calmness. The calmness seems to be a big part of people's attraction to Yoga.

They praise how they are able to reach a state of meditative calmness. Good for them.

I have been involved in Karate for a long time. There is an activity involved called Kata. These are strings of precise movement, done with moments of combat-speed intensity. On occasion, I've reached an incredibly deep state of meditative calm while performing Kata. The best name I've heard for this phenomenon is, “Moving Zen”.

More recently, I've become involved in Jiu-Jitsu. There are no Yoga poses, nor Kata. It is performed with a partner who is actively seeking to get themself into a position to choke you or to snap one of your major joints. You are also trying to do the same to them.

I've had moments of Zen while doing this.

You haven't lived until you're reached a point of total relaxation while being crushed beneath a large and powerful opponent. You wait mindlessly to instantly explode, without tension, and to do so in a manner dictated totally by the opponent's movement.

Again, a form of Moving Zen.