Hate Tests

My big exam to earn a Gracie Jiu-Jitsu Purple Belt is coming up in about a month.

All of my peers seem to think it's an exciting event; “Oh, boy. You get to go test for your Purple Belt!”

I think they're nuts.

Having spent decades in martial arts, I think I have a more realistic understanding of what is involved. The test will be demanding in itself, and there is a very strong possibility of failure.

In Karate, there were always people who fell short at every exam. The average failure rate was about 25%. Often, it was people who were clearly ready, but who underperformed on test day.

Many of my friends around here have also got experience with another martial art; Hapkido.

I have been training at our school for well over four years. About three times a year, the Hapkido class goes through testing. In all that time, every single student has passed every single exam. This is true not only in the colour belt ranks, but also for the Black Belts.

When they think “exam,” they consider it an event, where one demonstrates what they know, and are rewarded with promotion. Failure doesn't cross their minds.

When they think about Jiu-Jitsu exams, they realize that although failure is possible, it is only a theoretical kind of thing; not real.

So off I go next month to test. While I love training with the Gracies, I am certainly NOT looking forward to the exam.

I don't know where the standard lies, so I can't even guess at my odds of success.

Failure means doing the test over again at a future date. For me, it would be a full year before a possible return to LA for a second attempt. That would be rough.

Success means gaining the right to wear a snazzy Purple-coloured belt.

Jargon-Jitsu

I'm not a big fan of jargon. That's the stuff that certain professions or groups use instead of ordinary English.

Sometimes, there is no way around creating and using an activity-specific vocabulary, but often it works against clarity.

Let me give you a Jiu-Jitsu example.

Let's say the instructors want some of us to act in a certain way for a particular drill. Let's say they want us to be an untrained attacker, and to do so with low intensity.

Do they say, “attack as if you are an untrained person, and do so with low intensity?” Don't be silly.

They have made codes for the different kinds of attackers, and for the different intensities. With this in mind, you'd think they'd say, “be a level-one attacker, and do so with level one intensity.”

They don't, because they can't. Even in a class that consists of mostly long-time students, there are always new people around, and visitors.

So that everybody can understand, they always have to say, “be a level-one attacker. A level-one attacker is an untrained opponent. Attack with level-one intensity. Level-one intensity is a low intensity attack.”

Does it seem that using number codes for types of attackers and for levels of intensity makes sense? It doesn't to me.

It is also confusing. They use numbers for far too many things, that always need explanation every time they are used.

They also use numbers from one-to-ten regarding how hard punches hit. They then always describe how the number scale works. Why not just call punches, “light enough to not matter,” or “dangerous?”

Could we have a level-one attacker, with level-three intensity, throwing level-five and above punches?

If we did, it would be immediately followed by a paragraph long explanation of what a level-one attacker is, and what level-three intensity is, and what level-five punches are.

Just Do It

I look out over the sea of people who are full of good intentions.

They want to get more fit, or lose weight, or do something disciplined; even to just do something cool.

Don't put it off.

I picked up Jiu-Jitsu back in 2011 when I was a mere puppy of 55. I was a good candidate, being a regular runner, and biker, and generally active. Even so, I'd almost left it too late.

I'll make you a deal. If you come try Jiu-Jitsu (which is free for the first couple of weeks), and you are concerned about getting hurt, or overdoing it, or anything like that you can have me as your partner.

I'm a pretty good tutor, but even better at being a safe partner. I'm also remarkably durable, so you won't have to fret about hurting me, either.

If you don't want me for whatever reason, I can still fix you up with somebody great to work with. It won't hurt my feelings.

Tobias is great. Nervous about working with a man? How about Elizabeth?

Make it a challenge for the New Year. Come for AT LEAST every one of the free classes.

Even if you're not sure about everything, come to all.

If it seems OK after that. Sign up for some period of time that you can get yourself to commit to, then come to every one of those.

Try and make every class until you really, really know if you want to quit, or to keep it up. Then, make a solid decision of either;

A) I will stop now, or
B) I will continue until I reach this new goal that I am setting....

Don't put it off....

Old Fart Rolls

I love hearing how Rener Gracie talks about his grandfather's later years in Jiu-Jitsu.

His grandfather, of course, was the creator of Gracie Jiu-Jitsu, Helio Gracie. He was still on the mat well into his 90s.

He says that his Grandfather wasn't able to go around submitting athletic people, who were only a quarter of his age. He would still roll, and would be later express his delight in keeping the youngster from submitting him. With childlike delight, he would say things like, “See that young Purple Belt over there. He couldn't submit me.”

I think that's great.

That's kind of who I have to try and be.

Physically, when rolling with the young folks, it's like they are Spider Man, and I am a regular Joe.

I end up on the bottom most of the time. This means I am usually on the defensive. Being on the bottom, and defending, against somebody with a young person's strength, speed, and cardio is a distinct disadvantage, unless I have a significantly higher-level of skill.

At our school, we have basically people with two levels of technical knowledge and training. Against the newer advanced students, I have no problem. I can dominate them from the bottom, and can escape pretty much at will.

Against those with around my level of training, this doesn't work anymore. They have all that speed, strength, and cardio, and we all know the same stuff.

Therefore, I have to cheat.

The technical material our experienced advanced students are all trained in is called BBS1, and BBS2. There is a level above called BBS3, which had only been partially released, and which we are not yet training in during our group classes.

I am doing all I can to teach myself the material that's so far available in BBS3.

Last time we were in Los Angeles, I cheated another way. I had 4 private lessons with Gracie Headquarters Instructor, Jordan Collins. We spent every second of that time working on stuff for somebody from underneath to use against physically-dominant opponents.

I also review this material frequently.

I am certainly not Helio Gracie, the genius who created our form of Jiu-Jitsu, held the rank of 10^th Degree Black Belt, and who rolled well into his 90s.

I am only a lowly Blue Belt, who is able to roll competitively with my peers, while in my 60^th year.

Christmastime

This is our last training week before Christmas, as our school shuts down for 18 Jiu-Jitsu free days.

It's too long for my taste, but I think most really like the time off. Christmas is certainly a time for other sorts of things.

I do intend nibbling away at the beginning of the break. Our last class is two days from now, on Thursday.

Friday is the first day of closure, but I will be going in at the usual open-mat time. Maybe somebody will choose to join me, but maybe not. In any case, I will drill and review. This will shrink the closure for me by one day.

Saturday morning, I will again be on the mat with whoever wants to come. I've also found a partner who is wants to train Saturday evening, and again on Sunday.

My Jiu-Jitsu break will have shrunk from 18 days down to 15.

At the other end of the holiday season our head guy, Scott, wants to have a thing he calls a, "Hundred Minute Roll," on New Years Day. I don't know what our family schedule will be that far off, but if I am free, I'll be there. That would further shrink my Jiu-Jitsu break down to 11 days.

If I am rolling by New Years, I'll certainly be back on the mat the day after. That will be a Saturday, and a good time to open things up for open-mat again.

Instead of zero sessions during the official 18-day shut down, I might just end up having trained 6 times.

There will still be at least those 11 days of no training. It might be longer if getting to the, "Hundred Minute Roll," interferes with anything else more Christmassy.

Stupid Seventy

I am about to hit a glass ceiling at Jiu-Jitsu.

The belt system is quite demanding enough, and glacially slow. Getting a Blue Belt, which is the first awarded rank, takes typically one year. Each of the 3 other coloured belts (Purple, Brown, Black) is earned after progressing through 5 levels (zero through 4 stripes).

Perfect attendance would make the entire road from Blue to Black take ten years.

The road is never that smooth. I am hopefully approaching a Purple Belt, and that one alone will have taken me 3 years and 8 months. At that rate, my entire road to Black would take 11 years instead of 10.

Long enough, but nothing compared to what I am actually anticipating.

Students can only be promoted as high as one level below their instructor. I am currently close enough to Shawn that this presents a problem.

He is living in Mexico for more than the next year. Can't see the Gracies promoting him within that time. They only award instructor rank in person. After his Mexico time, he plans to return here late next winter. If he then travels to train with the Gracies at the very next instructor session, it will not occur until the following summer.

If he cannot go, or if they do not promote him, it will add another 6 months.

Instead of my next promotion after a Purple Belt coming 8 months later, it will likely take from a year-and-a-half to two years.

They also seem to award instructor rank at a pace 50% slower than students can earn. That would mean that I will also be progressing in rank at the same slow rate.

I will have trained for 3 years and 8 months to get Purple, which will be followed by about 5.5 years getting to Brown, and then 5 years to Black Belt. That's a total time of over 14 years.

The theoretical, fastest path would have me reaching Black Belt by age 66.

A prediction based on my actual speed of progress so far would see me getting there by 67.

My fastest actual, glass-ceiling arrival at Black Belt cannot occur until I am over 70.

Why does this matter?

If I were 30 years younger, it wouldn't. A Black Belt at 36, or 37, or 40 isn't all that different.

I've had lots of injuries. One of my knee wounds looked to be potentially Jiu-Jitsu ending, but it wasn't. The older I get, the more banged up I'll be, and the mending will be slower.

People in my age group get hurt doing chores, or lifting groceries. My wife had to give up the violin as it was too hard on her neck.

Jiu-Jitsu is a whole different magnitude of risk. Big, strong people try to choke me, or to rip off my legs, or arms, and to crush me will all of their weight. All the while, I wrench my neck out of their grasp, or whip my arms away, or explode from beneath and contest for the top position. It's remarkable I survive at all.

So to get a Black Belt all I have to do is to keep doing this for year after year, without injury.

It would be much nicer if I only had to do it until age 66, instead of 70.

Cold Time

I am not built for the cold. When winter temperatures arrive, my back tightens up and doesn't release until the weather warms up again in the spring.

Around here, that usually means November through March.

I used to live in Fort Saint John, where the temperatures in those months are typically -20 degrees, and a cold day is -40. Now we are on the Pacific coast and a nasty cold day is anything below freezing.

If I were Bill Gates rich, I'd want to be someplace warm for all five of those months, except for maybe a week or so to be with family wrapped tight around Christmas.

One winter we did two months in LA. We've also done Florida for a month, and a month in Arizona. All were smashing, and my cold-tightened back fully uncoiled each time.

Would I like to do five full months in any of those places? Hmmmm. An interesting thought.

Our month in Florida was a true “holiday.” We stayed in 5 different places and also a cruise. If we were to go for longer, likely we'd want to stay in one place for most of it, and to just “live.”

We did that in LA and in Arizona.

In LA we stayed in one hotel the entire two months. Helen joined a music group, and I did an average of two Jiu-Jitsu classes a day. We made a good friend, and when we returned to LA for two weeks last winter we stayed with her, and returned to our musical and martial routines.

In Arizona, we rented a mobile home in a retirement park, as did our great friends Lola and Bernie. We hung out together, and did craft things in the park. Bernie and Helen found music to join in with, and I trained at two Jiu-Jitsu schools in the city.

A five-month stint in any of those places would have to have at least one major change. In LA, and Florida, and for the vast majority of the Arizona time we ate out. That might kill us over a full 5 months.

The only problem with doing any of that for almost half the year is that we love our house, and our hometown. Neither of us wants to be away that much.

Like everything in life, one needs to strike just the right balance.