Intimidating. Me?

Noticed a weird phenomenon the other day. It seems some people in our advanced class are a little scared of me.

Let me set it up by saying that I don't usually pick my partners at sparring time. I take whoever wants to roll with me.

There seems to be two clear groups that like to pick me, and one that doesn't.

The first group that likes me is the smaller people. Tawha and Elizabeth usually pick me, as does Kaizen. He's a big boy, but not really into his adult strength yet. I think they pick me as I roll with them in a manner that doesn't rely on strength, at least I try.

The other group that likes to roll with me consists of guys like Robert and Tobias. They are similar to my size, darn strong, and know what they are doing on the mat.

The rest seem to prefer other partners. I don't mind, as I get them once in a while. Nobody actually ducks me, but they seem to prefer others than me. Some of them are bigger than me, and some smaller. The only thing they have in common other than being male, is that they are relatively inexperienced.

I always thought it was because they have friends they prefer to roll with, and had nothing really to do with me. Likely this is a big part of it, but there seems to be something else going on.

Last week I was taping up my finger like always, and a couple of these guys were in the change room with me. One of them asked if I wrapped my hand in order to intimidate them? I would have thought a bandaged would seem less threatening, not more. Seems not; as he was only half kidding. I think it's a case of the old guy with his heavily-striped-up belt has bandaged hands; a scarred warrior. Ridiculous, but there it was.

Keep in mind, I'm popular with the small people because I'm not dangerous. Somehow, to the less-experienced men I seem different.

The only thing I can think of that makes sense is that I know a heck of a lot more than they do. Although not physically dangerous, perhaps I am intimidating on some other kind of level. Maybe they fear getting dominated and made to feel silly.

Today, my first couple of sparring partners were people who usually choose me, but the third one wasn't.

Joe is our newest Blue Belt and was clear over the other side of the mat. At the call to, “grab a new partner,” he made a bee line for me. The less-experienced Blue Belt guys just don't do this.

We rolled. Nobody got submitted, and we went through a lot of positions. I sprung a few things on him that he hasn't seen before, but didn't push the advantage, giving him time to come up with a response. I was really impressed with how well he handled our roll. Nobody was ever in pain, or made to feel incompetent. I think he enjoyed it. I'll know if he tries to partner with me again.

I don't know how I feel about being considered intimidating.

It's pretty silly.